Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Can Men wear nail polish on their toes or fingers and still be Masculine?



BarefootTess.com - Large Size Women's ShoesIf you're into nail polish, and you're a guy, you've probably heard comments, or just imagined you'd hear comments like 'He's such a sissy' or 'That guy must want to be a girl'.  So I want to explore this thought process.

Does wearing nail polish as a man make you more feminine, or does it make you a sissy?  I used to worry that others would think that about me too.  I was trained by society to think that any guy who deviated from the 'accepted' mens style and did something like wearing pink, or cute shoes, or nail polish, or a skirt was a sissy.  So the first few times I went out with painted toes I was basically in a panic.  I tried real hard to not let anyone see my painted toes and would go out of my way to avoid being seen.  But of course this just made me look guilty and probably drew more attention to me.  And I've covered that subject before so won't go into it to much except to say that no one really noticed, and no one said anything.

So I started wearing nail polish more and more until I met my current wife who convinced me to keep my toes painted all the time, and not worry about who sees it.  Well, now that I do that I've also analyzed the issue of whether or not I'm more feminine than guys who don't do it.  And the truth is, it takes more bravery (didn't want to say balls and offend anyone, ohh, damn, said it anyway), to go out in public defying society standards of style than it does to be a sheeple and just conform.  (sheeple is my term for people who act like sheep and follow the masses).  So in reality guys who wear polish openly, or pink, or any other non standard fashion items, are actually braver and more confident than those who don't.  And isn't that basically what being masculine is about?  There's more to it than that, but the main point is, masculinity is NOT defined by how we decorate ourselves. 



I have also realized that I'm expressing my feminine side, which I believe ALL guys have, but just won't admit it for fear of being seen as a sissy.  We're all born with both male and female genes, it's just that men have predominately male genes and women have predominantly female genes.  So it's ok to admit that you have a softer side, or you like pretty things, or that you cry during emotional movies or family situations.  It DOES NOT make us less masculine, but instead makes us more of a man, in my opinion.  And it's not just my opinion, I've read this from many Women on forums, etc.  Now we still need to be masculine and be strong, taking care of our family, protecting family, and doing the hard things men are built to do, but we can still have a softer side as well.

It's all about balance.  If you allow yourself to express that softer side of yourself, in moderation, you
Me wearing 'womens' sandals with painted toes

will be a happier person, believe me.  It is very stressful to repress our feminine side all the time.  Let it out, just in moderation.  So say you like painting your nails.  You could paint fingers and toes, and maybe even wear some sandals that are prettier than normal male bland sandals, but if you wear male
style clothes, hairstyle, etc, you can still look plenty masculine.  Balance your style and you can still be masculine with red painted toes.  But if you take it to far, you will appear feminine to others.  And if that's your intention, go for it, but for most of us we want to still be a guy, just a guy who paints his nails.  And I've found that each guy has his own definition of what is to much, so find your own balance, and if you still feel masculine, then have fun with it.

I actually believe that some of the guys who appear super masculine because they are body builders, or they hunt all the time, walk around in camo all the time, drive big honkin trucks, etc, are actually more feminine than the average guy.  But they are so afraid of that side of themselves that they compensate by appearing even more masculine with their actions.  I'm not saying that all guys who do these things are more feminine, but I believe a lot are.  And I like plenty of normal guy things like fast cars, etc, so I'm not knocking these things or suggesting guys need to take up needlepoint or something.  I'm just saying we can find balance in our lives but allowing ourselves to express our softer side while still wearing camo, or hunting, or working on cars as my friend Guy Polish Jim recently showed in his blog post at http://polished-men.blogspot.com/2013/03/polish-demolish.html.

Jim is a good example of what I'm talking about.  He's a big guy who played offensive guard in college, but he still likes keeping all his nails painted, with his finger nails being longer than average even.  And he's not afraid of buying sandals from the womens section if they appeal to him.  Now he maintains a very masculine appearance otherwise, so he's a good example of how you can keep a balance masculine look with painted nails.

I'm a bigger guy myself at 6' 2", 210 lbs, and I do construction work.  And I wear sandals when I'm working, with my painted toes showing and have Never received a negative comment.  But I usually look very masculine in my work clothes as shown on the right, so no one questions my masculinity. 

So guys, if you know you're masculine, then go ahead and paint your nails, or buy those pretty shoes you like, etc.  Just keep it in balance and don't worry about the small percentage of people who might think you are a sissy, or whatever.  I can tell you that most women appreciate a man that is confident enough to do his own thing so you may just impress more women with painted nails than without.

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39 comments:

  1. Great post! You really said it well. People that are the most insecure often over compensate.

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  2. A quality read! Now i should say i AM straight and i am not a crossdresser or a TV, i also have a gorgeous loving female partner who is positive about me and my style. however im a guy who paints his nails hands and feet, i also shave my legs, i also wear makeup, i also prefer to wear tights instead of socks! So as you can imagine it takes a lot of people a moment to realise hey he is just like the next person! People say to me "why do you wear makeup/nail varnish/tights etc" my answer is give me a good reason why i cant!! Nobody can hahaha live life be happy and harm nobody best way to be in my book! . . . . . . Peace Jethro x

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  3. Masculinity erm thats a term for people worried about how they look to others, its a thing for body builder guys and mirrors! Peace

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  4. I have kept my toes painted for the past year, changing colors every two weeks. This past week I stayed at a resort condo, and did exactly as you wrote in your blog. Be confident, and go as nothing is wrong with you. I wore a tangerine orange nail polish that matched the wife's nails.She noticed a few glances at my feet, but no one commented at all

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    1. Excellent Barry! Good to hear it went well for you, and I hear this all the time, so guys, just do it. It's about 1000 times worse in your head than in reality.

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  5. I also paint my hands and feet shave my arms legs ect.. I am happily married all I can say is be your self and you will never feel better

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  6. Your feet are much nicer than mine and I'm a girl lol. Will you share your skine and nail care regemin?

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    1. You know, that's a good idea. Be watching for that post soon, and thanks for the suggestion.

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  7. I'll be 60 years old this year, married for 37 years, heart attack and stroke survivor but unfortunately the stroke left me legally blind. I use 2 magnifiers to cruise the web and see most other things. I use a white cane mostly for balance and to ID myself to others (makes a big difference). Was an avid fisherman. Belong to the NRA and a gun club. I'm also a member of the American legion. 4 kids and 4 grandchildren.

    and

    I wear nail polish 24/7.

    I never was interested in my toes being done just my fingers. I was a severe nail biter most of my life. It took years for them to grow back correctly. Now that they have, I appreciate the dearly. About a year ago while sitting in front of my computer I noticed a little box next to my screen. It had been there foe awhile but never paid any attention to it. Avon Rose Gold. Always wanted to try this so.........with magnifiers off I went. Took me about an hour but it came out pretty nice. I went to the other room and showed the wife. Her first reaction was "you stole my Rose Gold!" then she said that she liked and it looked good on me. Since my surgery I've been wearing a couple of her rings. She's got new ones and hasn't worn these in years. With my nails done and the rings my hands do look feminine but I used to love looking at them on her especially with her nails done.

    The next day we set out to do our weekly rounds. 2 markets, a discount club and the local liquor store. The people all know us, after all it's difficult to miss us with the white cane. At one market I picked up a new color. While at the check out ( I write the checks while holding my magnifiers which becomes a bit tedious) The cashier said "must be redoing your nails tonight" I just answered YUP! It's funny how I expected it to bother me but it didn't. Actually kind of enjoyed someone noticing.

    Well that's how it started. I wear anything but red and black. Right now they're a light military green with dark blue tips. I tone them down for family stuff like birthdays and the like but I still wear color.

    If you enjoy it, go for it. You only go this way once. I'm one of the lucky. I got a second shot!

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  8. Jim, love your story! So good to hear there are so many guys of all ages trying nail polish in public and loving it. Thanks for sharing your story.

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    1. Thank you!

      I think your blog is a great service to other regular guys that admire others nails but are hesitant to walk out of the house with nails they painted.

      I didn't need any courage on my first time because of my blindness. That morning I was more concerned about shaving and getting ready. I paid no attention to what I did the night before. I didn't even realize it till I was in the car. By then it was an "OH WELL". I really enjoy it now. Not a big fan of application but love wearing my colors.

      The kids are the tough ones but everyone else just doesnt seem to care. I thought I was alone on this and didn't bother looking into it until recently. WOW, there's alot of us out there and it seems to be growing. Hey, I love it, my wife helps me look for new things and colors, we were even looking at a proffesional manicure today and the salon laughed when I showed my nails. They have gotten fairly long! Also, during the past year I've gotten my ears pierced. Even though I've got 3 holes on each side (got carried away that day) I only wear a pair.

      Anyway, thanks again I just hope it helps another to "GET OVER IT" and go out there and enjoy.

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    2. The one thing I forgot to mention is .... look at the tattoos some are getting. These are not temporary markings you can remove anytime you want. Finger and Toe nail colors are temporary markings are a wise choice in place of tats. Enjoy today then remove tomorrow . What could be better? I can put flags on my nails for the 4th and spiders for Halloween and on and on ... or ....nothing at all. FUN all it is.

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  9. Got a little excited today. me and the wife walked into the local dollar store and they had a full display of REVLON COLOURS. Didn't have much time but for a buck I picked the first 2 colours I liked. I'll be back when I have more time. Great find!

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    1. This is like finding 22 cal and 9mm ammo available and at a cost of 1999.

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    2. Hey I know you never hear from kids at these sites but anyway I'm a 14 yr boy. I play basketball football n track. I m a straight boy and for the most part I m a normal guy. But recently I have been looking at these web site and it really got me to start painting my nails. I started by painting my toes with the red polishes that my mom has and I have also gone to cvs and brought a pink and a blue. I have not told any one wat I have done. I m a little scared of the out come. I hav wore clears to school but some of the girls were giving me weird looks. I guess I mostly afraid of my family and friends. I'm friends are good kids but they are a little rednecky around people that do "weird/ gay" things (I know nail polish isn't gay but that's what they think). So I have a wat should I do? Should I just come out and be my nail polish self or should I do something else?

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    3. Hey I know you never hear from kids at these sites but anyway I'm a 14 yr boy. I play basketball football n track. I m a straight boy and for the most part I m a normal guy. But recently I have been looking at these web site and it really got me to start painting my nails. I started by painting my toes with the red polishes that my mom has and I have also gone to cvs and brought a pink and a blue. I have not told any one wat I have done. I m a little scared of the out come. I hav wore clears to school but some of the girls were giving me weird looks. I guess I mostly afraid of my family and friends. I'm friends are good kids but they are a little rednecky around people that do "weird/ gay" things (I know nail polish isn't gay but that's what they think). So I have a wat should I do? Should I just come out and be my nail polish self or should I do something else?

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    4. Hey man I'm 17 and I'm the same way. I know it seems weird and that you will be judged hard for wearing nail polish. Just know that if thats who you are then people will accept you for that. I'm having trouble "coming out" as well, but I'm worried people will think I am gay, even though that just because we wear nail polish does not mean that. I hope you figure things out.

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  10. If you're into nail polish, and you're a guy, you've probably heard comments, or just imagined you'd hear comments like 'He's such a sissy' or 'That guy must want to be a girl'.
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    1. Actually, in all my years of openly wearing nail polish on my toes, I've never heard such comments. The fear is all in our heads.

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  11. Yesterday I had a mani/pedi and left with clear polish applied. During the winter I keep my toenails colored some version of red. It comes off during beach season out of respect to my wife.
    I also like to cross dress and I think that polished nails complete the look. At some point I would hope to be in a situation where I can wear colored polish 24/7 but for now I will respect my wife's wishes.
    Pat

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  12. Reading your blog has inspired me to wear nail polish. I'm sure I'll face some criticism from some people and it is a little scary at first, but I think the benefits are worth it. I've had two pedicures now and loved it. I did go out this weekend to the beach and wore light orange/coral colored polish and I think it looked awesome with my tan. Now to get some better sandals than the huge flip flops that they sell for men! :)

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    1. Way to go Walt. It's just fun, so keep it up!

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  13. I have been painting my toenails for several years now. I like it I think it is cool, and I do not give a good damn about what others think about it.
    http://www.hipforums.com/newforums/picture.php?albumid=1392&pictureid=48979

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    1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

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  14. I am a 17 year old boy and I love painting my nails. I have gotten a few manicures and a pedicures, but I always get weird looks. Also the only polish I have revealed to the public is clear, but I want to wear more color. I love wearing nailpolish, but I just can't bring myself to wear it in front of my friends (guys or girls) or in public in general. Can you other polish enthusiests offer any advice to help me into wearing color polish out?

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    1. Just do it! Start with black and tell people you're going through a heavy metal phase if you have to. Be yourself bro. Wear a kilt if it feels right :-)

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  15. I tried clear polish on my toes for the first time last week. A day later my fiancé noticed. She was pretty receptive and even offered to paint them. I already go barefoot everywhere so the shock value is gone. Any dark colors are more noticeable so I'm going to try sheers. I've noticed most people are not paying attention anyway.

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  16. I have my fingers and toes polished all the time and really enjoy it. I am going to keep them done to. No negative comments or looks so far but, it's not my problem if some don't like it anyway.

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  17. went for a walk this afternoon with purpose. my nails are very long and painted in raisin. after doing yard work today ... took a shower then set off for stuff. walked a total of 2 miles to place my supper order, buy booze and cigs, pick up milk for the wife's coffee then pick up the take out order. nails are 2 weeks old with rings on my ring fingers that really don't suit a man profile. NOT one notice , NOT one comment. been doing this for more than a year. love my nails. they are really fucked right now but really noticeable. the reason I walk this shit is I'm blind. well at the very LEAST .....legally. I will not give up my nails for any reason or fear. I like them, they make me happy AND they are mine.

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  18. This made me feel so much better, seeing the original blog and all the comments. I feel a lot more confident now as I used to get bullied, called gay ect. It just makes me happy to see people like you :)

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  19. WELL, today was a turning point for me. let my nails go for much too long. remember. i'm a finger guy. my toe nails suck and I just cut the points off. between the gardening, yard cleanup, new fence, the crap the new fence left .... well .... I've been letting my nails go without attention. they have grown 1/2 inch past the tips of my fingers but are in rough and unpainted. spent some of the morning shaping, cleaning and smoothing. went shopping then came home and repainted. I feel soooo much better looking at them now. more raisin but I really like this color. tomorrow is 37 years married with the wife. gonna walk to the market (remember i'm legally blind) and get her a lobster..... then cook it up for her. NAILS ignored. why should woman ONLY enjoy their nails. live on gents and enjoy.

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  20. First of all, thank you for your blog. It's great that people like you are finally being open about men's likes, feelings, etc. and that it is actually more masculine to do so than to blindly follow societal ideas, real and imagined, of what manliness looks like. You've done a stellar job of covering so many points regarding our personal choices about how we present ourselves to the world. (You need only look at history to see just how flamboyantly men used to dress. By comparison, painted toenails are practically nothing!)

    I've been painting my toenails, on and off, for the past 10 to 12 years. I really like the way my feet look with nail polish and the way they make me feel, but never had the nerve to go out in public until now. Thanks to your reasoning, encouragement, and the realization that I'm not alone out here, I've been going out with my painted toes for all to see. It's been a truly liberating experience, and I am more confident and outgoing in public as a result. I was mildly apprehensive the first time then mildly disappointed when no one seemed to even notice. (I guess I was hoping for a compliment on my color choice!) You are right, the problem was mostly in my head. Thanks again, Guy.

    My wife enjoys the way my painted toes look and likes to help select new colors to try (I lean toward dark reds). I'm planning to book pedicures for both of us soon, and if I may, will report here on how it goes. (BTW Painting each other's toenails is just another little inimacy we like to enjoy.) Finally, as per your more recent post, I am seriously considering a toe ring and getting some prettier sandals. Please keep up the good work.

    Regards,
    Jim

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  21. I have always been fascinated with nail polish. I love painting my nails and toes. I am in College now, but I am scared that I will scare off any girls by wearing nail polish and that guys will think I am weird. Guy who loves painting his nails but is afraid of social ridicule big shock I know. But can anyone offer any tips on how to maybe ease into wearing it more or finding a girl who appreciates a masculine guy wearing nail polish. Also any colors that would be more discreet would be appreciated

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    1. Mix black with reds and blues. Don't "show off" your male polish. Wear what feels good to you and the girls will pick up on your confidence. If a dame mentions your male polish she's most likely interested.

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  22. I'm 23 and I've been wearing nail polish since middle school because it's a unique, creative, and harmless way to express yourself. I mean, it's only paint and it comes off and I don't see any problem with color choice either and it's up to the individual what they want to wear. I enjoy all colors especially black, red, purple, blue, and recently I've been into pink. I've gotten nothing but positive comments in this small town called Farmington, NM. I stopped caring what people would say and just go for it and a good majority of girls I've talked to either don't say anything or say it's cool and shows your confidence in your own masculinity. I work overnight shifts, do boxing workouts, bike ride, hike, and rock to metal and I'm comfortable with wearing nail polish.

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  23. I wear OPI
    In the spot pink on my hands. It's a very light color and I like it as you cant really tell unless you look close. I also am wearing a BB polish on my.toes

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  24. I wear OPI
    In the spot pink on my hands. It's a very light color and I like it as you cant really tell unless you look close. I also am wearing a BB polish on my.toes

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  25. Johnny Depp, Alice Cooper, Marilyn Manson, Dennis Rodman, Kurt Cobain, Seal, Dewayne Wade, Chris Brown, an every death metal band ever. « all paint their nails. Nuff said

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